I'll be right here, lying in the hands of God

Me: I'm going to be this soldier, because he has a mustache.
3-year-old Elias: My dad has a mustache.
Me: No, I don't think he does. I've never seen him with a mustache?
Elias: Well he does. He hides it behind his hair.
Me: Oh.....okay.
Elias: God has a mustache too.
Me: Really? How do you know?
Elias: When you get to Heaven, you will know too.


When I am strong, I am very strong, and I wish I could bottle up the strength and save it for my weak moments and take a sip and feel strong again. 
Sometimes I go to God so grateful, and sometimes I come to Him in a panic and tell him I doubt all the goodness He seems to think he has for me.

My poor, beautiful Elaine, who has so much more hurt in her life right now than I know what to do with, she sat on the floor at 4:45am this morning while I brewed 6 pitchers of tea and said, "Do you ever wish that God would just tell you whether you are wasting your time or whether to make a move?"
"Yes," I said.
"Like, I just wish I knew when it was time to give up, and move down a different road."
"Exactly," I said.

I can't wait for that day that God tells me what I'm supposed to be doing, but I'll just keep asking Him everyday and make thousands of cups of coffee in the meantime.

Elias: Why are you laughing at me?
Me: Because I think you are really funny.
Elias: No. I'm not funny.
Me: Why wouldn't you want to be funny? Everyone wants to be funny!
Elias: I want to be a serious boy.