We chase what is left
of her alive
from room to room.
The scent, the handwriting, and her
reflections in the mirrors.

QUOTES

"It's like, you could be a bum, and as long as you had intuitiveness and some fish, you would be the richest person in the world." -Nick, on living in Hawaii
(Thanks Ashleigh)

"We could leave them a comment like, "I've notice our waiter's hair is getting longer."" -Bryan, on comments/concern cards at SLPP a long time ago

"Ha ok, awesome! You'll notice after talking to my mom for 2 minutes she will need to know every single detail. Who where why what for who's that what's that smell is that guy dead gifts money slayer how much reservations DNA left handed ice cream oil change soap cake naps directions time zone what's that smell again can I bring a blanket what color shoes ect..." -also Bryan, via Text the week before their wedding

"I'm really disappointed in Paige Davis lately, her hair keeps getting shorter and shorter." -Philip, absentmindedly after an RC Willey commercial

Philip and I both realized we have this LOVE moment with Kelsey G. of when we tell her stories. You can always expect this moment when her eyes turn very wide and her mouth opens crazy, and she starts laughing really hard. It is ALWAYS rewarding to tell her a good story. I save them up to tell her.
She sort of understands the person I am, when I am a lunatic burnout, and she does crazy things with me.
I will miss her.
There are certain selfish parts of me that hope that Phoenix, AZ is a horrible place, and that she moves back and wants to hang out with me when she is older.

I am a very selfish person.

"Kelsey, how did you get that hat to stay on your head?"
"That is exactly what I am wondering!"
-a brief encounter, 11 months ago

When we were younger, there was a good 6 to 8 months that we ate these soybean patties for many meals a week. I don't know why we had so many of them.
We were poor.
We tried to come up with new ways to use the patties. Cutting them up and tried to disguise them in other foods, to add protein and stuff.

It's not like we're rich these days. But there are a lot of things I'm realizing now that I wish I could have told 14, 15, 16, 17 year old Rachel were going to happen, and the lessons I would learn. But I don't think it would have been worth it, if I didn't learn them for myself. What I'm saying is, I couldn't have foreseen the trips to California, and Mexico. The rich people I've spent time with, the sushi and cocktails, the dresses I've worn, the handsome men who've tried to convince me of...anything they wanted to convince me of. A lot of worthless worldly things, that are still good for experience-sake, but looked more glamorous during adolescence.

I wish I could tell my 21 year old self the values I will know by 25. But I think that is why I have awesome friends with good advice.

"Nick, what put that into your brain to put basil leaves in your beer?"
"I don't know."
"Did it fall into your beer?"
"Hey peanut butter wasn't invented on purpose."
-Stesha and Nick