but I'd rather not celebrate my defeat and humiliation here with you

salt fingers, cuts, yes cuts. Hold an amp in your arms. No, please feel this way when you sit on the couch, and then never feel that way again. Take a picture. Your eyes have never looked that way before, to me, and it shuts down my heart to never love. A tube of paint? Dirty in the morning, dirty at night. With only seven cups of coffee to keep her moving, honey? How's she gonna do that tomorrow and the next day, with sticky fingers and skinny jeans?
I don't have words, anymore. I don't think straight, anymore.
The only thing I know is Jesus.
The only thing that keeps me free is Jesus.
The only way my heart is clean enough to get out of bed in the morning and look you in the eyes is Jesus.

eventually my mouth will just turn to dust.